How is it even possible to have a child old enough to graduate?!

Because seriously, last time I looked, she was about 10.   It's hard to believe that two little long haired, twirling hippies had a baby, just yesterday, I swear:

I'm not even sure she was baby so much as little froglette here...and we were so young and absolutely CLUELESS about the adventure we were setting out on.  But somehow, this little baby thrived in our care:

Became a beauty...we thought (still do) the most beautiful baby in all the land.  She was witty and funny, even as a toddler, speaking to us in adult speak accented by a faint lisp...one that my speech therapist mother didn't even have to cure...she was so smart she self corrected!

We delighted in the fact that her hair stayed red, and were even more pleased when freckles dotted the bridge of her nose, and eventually her entire sweet face:

a la the then also sweet faced Lindsay Lohan!

This sweet little girl of mine is at school for her last full day.  Her last full day of high school!  Tomorrow she goes to prom...looking like the most beautiful girl I've always known she is:

The world is lying at her feet.  Anything can happen.  The future belongs to her.  I'm insanely proud and love her fiercely.  And while I occasionally miss that sweet baby face, I look forward to knowing the woman she is becoming.  I mean it, despite the tears that are welling up trying to convince me otherwise.

How do we feel about this "Rapture" I keep hearing so much about?

I'm not a great planner, but I'm thinking about a post Rapture brunch?!  You know, because post Rapture looting should never be attempted on an empty stomach.  What best captures the essence?  Eggs Benedict?  Too showy?  Fritatta?  I just don't know.  Definitely Bloody Marys...got to get my courage up pre-loot.  Just hope I don't get all sleepy from the food and drink and miss out on all the iPads!  Wish me luck!

and on the umpteenth day, we started to build the damn ark!!!!!

It's rainy again today.
I cannot the last day it wasn't rainy...no, wait...yes I can.  Last Friday...one week ago tomorrow.
I know this because I desperately wanted to flee my workplace but everyone else already had that idea before me, so I was the loser left behind minding the fort.  My friend got completely sunburned that day in a way that I am actually jealous of now, knowing that he started his base tan nearly a week ago, and I have no idea when we might actually see that big yellow orb again.  The newscasters tease us with ongoing regularity...on Tuesday it was Thursday, last night it was Monday, today it looks like Tuesday...for the love of all things not already soggy...let it be soon!!!

On the upside, it makes for lovely white noise and decent overall sleeping conditions.
I have to focus on the upside.

Other good things about rainy days:

I don't feel guilty about getting snuggly with a book on the sofa after work.
Comfort food tastes even better somehow.
We're in for a string of beautiful days once it stops...or at least I hope so.  Maybe all this rain now will mean no rain for Hannah's prom and/or commencement?
Curly hair?
Saving propane for later in the summer, when I absolutely will NOT want to turn on the oven?

What say you?

Anyone else finding anything to celebrate with all this rain?

Blogger ate a post

Which is somehow alright with me, as I was sort of slamming somebody in it, but dammit, it was MY POST...and now it's just gonzo.

Today is one of those glorious once in a season kind of days and I'm working...a regular cellar dweller, missing the entire thing!  It's bollocks!  Also bollocks?  The fact that more than half this office is out and it's Parents' Weekend.  I am in jack-in-the-box mode and exhausted by it.  My feet hurt.  Mostly because I wore pink very high heels in support of my sweet friend Jodi's walk for breast cancer.  I'm head to toe pink, but the toe part is feeling extremely tired right about now...killing me!

It's been a long week, and I'm ready for it to end, but mostly I'm wishing/ACHING to be outside...face to the sun getting a sprinkling of cinnamon sugar freckles across my nose while sipping an iced coffee and reading a good book.  Why can't I have this?

Things I do not understand...

Why do fingernails grow like weeds in the spring/summer time?  My diet hasn't changed really.  Does increased amounts of pate and cheese accelerate fingernail growth?  No really, I need to know!  I know it has nothing to do with sunshine, as we haven't seen enough of that to make any difference with anything of late.

Why do you need an entire day off to prepare  green salad?

    It's a salad.

    You are having guests to dinner on a Friday night, and the main course is steak, which your husband is grillling.  You're getting off easy by not having to prepare the actual meal at graduation. Hmmm...come to think of it, with graduation on a Saturday, why do you need Monday off, too?  No bother, I've just amended my calendar to do the same, although I will actually be preparing food...to serve to more people...people who, like me, cannot stand the sound of gum snapping.

The metric system.
No really, I simply just do not get it.  Why was there such a big push for it in Europe?  Why didn't it take off in the US?  Are we just too simple to embrace the math?  Or smart for refusing to do so?

Finally, what are we going to do as a whole when Oprah goes off the air?  Has she simply made enough other people famous so that we won't miss her so much in her absence?  Will the Doctors and Dr. Oz and Dr. Phil be enough?  Does anyone even watch them?

Ok...I always feel better after a little purge.
Thanks a million!

A very happy Mother's Day

They just seem to get better and better.
This year's mother's day was brought to me by ranunculus (my absolute favorite flower), bloody Mary's, hanging flowers, rose bushes, Godiva chocolates, sweet daughters, a good husband, a loving extended family, goopy cheeseburgers, and brownie sundaes.  Oh, and our own attempt at a modern version of American Gothic...it just kind of happened...we have fun.

It's GOOD to have fun.
I'm blessed.

Sun is out, funk is gone...must be Friday!

I think pizza and mojitos helped, too.
In any case...suddenly everything really is unicorn princesses and rainbows, and I'm rolling with it.
Sun is out, it's warming up, I have about 40 beautiful tulips in my garden, and it's Friday!!  The Friday before Mother's Day.  And the sun is out, did I mention that?

Emily will attend her first prom tomorrow night.  I cannot fully wrap my head around this fact.  First, that my youngest baby girl is 15 and therefore old enough to attend a prom.  And the way she looks in the dress?!  Fuggedaboudit!  If her date's jaw doesn't literally hit the floor I'll be disappointed.  Let's just say, much like her older sister, the apples didn't fall far from the tree. :)  She looks beautiful, and I'm happy that her first prom will be with a friend and she should be able to really have fun and not feel any pressure to be anything other than a dance companion! (phew!)

We'll host a biggish crowd on Sunday for Mother's Day and I'm ready.  I'm ready to be grilling slutty cheeseburgers and drinking gin on a sunny deck with my family...some of my dearest friends.  I'm excited to be fully embracing spring this way, to put my hands in soil and plant some flowers and a plant of remembrance for Claudia...for all of us to remember her always.

So yes...what a difference a few days makes.  Sun is the best drug out there...followed by Village Pizza, which honestly cures everything!

Anyone seen my happy?

I'm in a funk, plain and simple.
Nothing can seem to get me to snap out of it...or nothing I've tried so far.

I spent the weekend pretty much alone...which can be great and/or miserable, and proved to be a little of both.
Saturday was a little weird...kids slept late leaving me to myself in the morning.  But after doing yoga, reading the paper and grocery shopping I felt suddenly rushed to go meet with an old friend and then off to the office for what turned out to be a waste of an hour.  I did go to the library following that stint, and picked up some movies and books.  Something to throw myself into on a non-pay weekend.  Before I knew it I was home, prepping dinner...nothing special on Saturday night...standard fare.  Geoff and I found ourselves kid-less, but I was in a foul mood...and not even a long soak in the tub could fix it.  Sat in front of an infomercial for Time Life series of Singers and Songwriters of the 60s and 70s and wept.  With Geoff.  Dear god, what is going on with me?

Slept in on Sunday and woke to an empty house.  Didn't feel remotely like exercising, so I didn't.  I watched "Julie and Julia" instead.  I never seem to see movies in a timely fashion.  What does that even mean?  Anyway, it prompted me to want to cook...so I did.  A creamy carrot and cilantro soup, deviled eggs, stuffed mushroom caps, a red potato salad and pork chops to go with it all.  My kids were due to be home and I invited a friend to join us.  And then nobody came.  Really...it was just Geoff and myself again.  I cried.  I stood at my kitchen sink and wept.  Not at the thought of being alone with Geoff, but just feeling let down.  I put everything in the fridge and we ate soup and mushrooms, and I took yet another bath and was in pj's by 7pm.

I took Monday off.  I just couldn't face the day.
Plus, in addition to this ill mood, I had a recurrence of a most pesky ailment that will not be named.  And suffice it to say, this was enough to keep me home, but the ill mood absolutely kept me abed a little longer than usual.  I did not exercise...again.  Instead I spent the day reading.  Short stories.  They're good.  I'm practically addicted.  Written by the same author over 20 years and all published in the New Yorker...the themes are strong but also rather depressing.

I came in to work today after missing one day and immediately felt attacked when questioned about something I did on Friday.  I burst into tears.  What is wrong with me?

I need some HAPPY!!!!

Today I will go home and do yoga.
I'm hoping this will help.
I don't know what else to do.